Star Trek - The Re-Watch. Join me through all 79 Episodes!

[Shelby]

A Private Little War

4211.4

We open with our landing party on a tranquil planet that looks like southern California again. Kirk has apparently been here before, and describes the inhabitants as peaceful. Once he’s said that, you know we’re about to have trouble in paradise.

Kirk and Spock come upon some villagers ready to ambush a group of hill people. Kirk is astonished to see that the villagers have flintlocks, since they’d only progressed to bows and arrows the last time he was here.

Kirk recognizes one of the hill people as Tyree, the man he’d stayed with on his first visit. Kirk pulls his phaser to spoil the ambush, but Spock reminds him that its use has been forbidden. So the captain throws a rock instead.

The angry villagers pursue. Spock is shot but the landing party manages to transport away before being confronted. So much for paradise.

Oh look, it’s Dr M’Benga and Nurse Chapel. They help McCoy work on Spock right there in the transporter room. McCoy doesn’t yet know if Spock is going to pull through. After all, he’s got green blood on both the front and back of his tunic, so the flintlock ammo has passed through his chest.

Meanwhile we learn there’s a Klingon ship in orbit, but it’s unaware of the Enterprise. Scott remarks that it’s a “hands-off” planet, and the Klingons can do scientific research if they want to. Kirk doesn’t believe the natives went from bows to flintlocks so quickly, and Chekov and Uhura join the debate until Kirk cuts them all off. Well, so much for that Enterprise camaraderie we’ve come to expect!

Oh OK, Kirk apologizes quietly, he’s just upset. There’s our human captain.

Turns out there’s nothing they can do for Spock, because they have no replacement organs for him. Apparently M’Benga interned in a Vulcan ward, and Vulcans can sometimes heal themselves while they’re out. So they hope for the best.

Kirk wants McCoy to return to the planet with him, to determine if the Klingons are doing scientific research, or violating “the treaty.” (That would be the Organian Peace Treaty from Errand of Mercy.) Kirk says he’ll need the kind of advice he gets from Spock.

Kirk’s log entry tells us that he needs to keep their presence a secret from the Klingons, so he’s on his own. He’ll contact the natives in violation of his orders. Scott also points out that if he has to break orbit while they’re gone, they’ll be out of reach. Oh dear, sounds like a set-up to me!

Kirk and McCoy beam down wearing the garb of the hill people. Strangely, McCoy’s vest is tied shut, but Kirk’s is open to reveal his torso. Ah, so manly.

But not manly enough! Kirk is bitten by a big white ape-like alien, a mugato, and its bite is poisonous. McCoy phasers the thing out of existence, but only the natives have a cure. Some hill people happen to show up and McCoy gets them to take Kirk to their village.

Hey, McCoy gets to make a log entry! Well, Kirk’s unconscious so don’t get used to it. Anyway, we learn that Tyree is the leader now and his wife knows the cure. That’s convenient, I guess everything will be OK. Right?

Now we meet Tyree and his wife, the “Kahn-ut-tu” woman Nona (played by the famous Nancy Kovack). She is the stereotypical wife who keeps pushing her husband towards power. He thinks the villagers will return to their formerly peaceful ways, but she wants the hill people to get guns too so they can take what they want! She uses an aphrodisiac to get Tyree all worked up just in time for a runner to bring news of Kirk’s return. Nona runs off leaving the addled Tyree behind.

Nona arrives just in time to see McCoy using a phaser to heat up some rocks to keep Kirk warm. Bet you can see where this is going. Nona demands Tyree tell her everything about Kirk before she’ll cure him. Wow.

Meanwhile back on the ship, Chapel holds the unconscious Spock’s hand. Isn’t this a breach of ethics? M’Benga catches her, and surmises that Spock knows too in spite of appearing unconscious. Whoopsie, not embarrassing at all.

Nona does her mystic cure on Kirk, those strange ways that may be found among the stars. Also revealing that a primitive hill woman has manicured nails painted with pearlescent polish. Nice touch. We get the strange, dreamy Star Trek music, which works exceedingly well here. Oh, and one more thing. After that ritual, legend says that Kirk can refuse her nothing. Seems like that happens to Kirk a lot, doesn’t it?

Cut to sick bay, where M’Benga tells Chapel to call him if Spock starts to awaken. And to do whatever Spock tells her. What could he mean?

Tyree has watched villagers making flintlocks, and agrees to take Kirk to see for himself. Kirk shows Tyree a phaser and Nona says she wants Kirk to make Tyree “a man of great importance.” She also reveals that she knows they’re from the stars. Here we go.

Kirk talks about non-interference. Tyree says he won’t kill. Nona says if they’d let Tyree die when they could save him, then Tyree has the wrong friends. Good point. She adds that she has the wrong husband, and walks out.

Can this marriage be saved?

Kirk and McCoy agree that they’ll have to act if the Klingons have been interfering; but Kirk won’t like it.

This is actually a nice look into Kirk’s thinking, into his views on right and wrong. I always appreciate when we get these glimpses inside a character.

At the village Kirk and McCoy discover high-tech gear and a Klingon (named Krell), who says this planet will become part of the Klingon Empire. I’d like to point out that Krell has the perfect TOS Klingon appearance in every respect, which gives me the warm fuzzzies. It’s also neat that McCoy gets to do non-doctor stuff in this episode; mostly because Spock’s unconscious, but hey, take what you can get.

Cut to Spock trying to wake up. He orders Chapel to hit him, but Scott walks in and prevents her! M’Benga follows and whacks Spock several times before the pain finally brings him back to consciousness. Vulcan hospitals must be a lot of fun.

By the way, Spock’s got a little five o’clock shadow! Are we really trying to be that accurate?

Back on the planet Kirk is teaching the hill people to use a flintlock they got while in the village. McCoy gets a chance to be indignant, and Kirk goes on about maintaining a balance of power. McCoy points out that Tyree doesn’t want to fight, so Kirk says maybe Nona can convince him. Sounds like a walk into the lion’s den to me.



And so it is. Kirk finds Nona bathing (of course). She uses the aphrodisiac on him just in time for Tyree to catch them. He considers shooting (who would he shoot?), but then he throws the flintlock down and leaves. Next, a mugato (one of the white apes) shows up and threatens Nona, so the drugged Kirk phasers it. Nona gets a hungry look and clunks Kirk over the head with a rock.

McCoy gets Tyree to lead him back to the site, where they find Kirk and a rock. Nona has run off with his phaser. She reveals herself to a villager patrol, and says she wants to offer the phaser to their leader. Wow, how treacherous is that? But no matter, they just try to assault her. (It’s actually an uncomfortable scene.) When Kirk, McCoy and Tyree arrive in the nick of time, the villagers stab Nona and there’s a fight. Now that Nona is dead, Tyree wants to become a killer. Well, I guess Nona finally succeeded in manipulating him, but I bet it wasn’t her method of choice.

A very good episode. Yes, I’ve seen it a million times, and often that means it’s lost its impact for me. And while I wasn’t quite as absorbed at certain points as I should’ve been, I can’t deny that the episode still had the desired effect on me.



At the end Kirk looks very grim indeed, and refers to bringing more flintlocks down as introducing serpents to the Garden of Eden. It’s a very emotional scene, and as always Shatner pulls it off admirably.

Kovack also gives a praiseworthy performance, she’s very believable. Other than parts of his usual tirade, Kelley’s McCoy comes off very well too. Nimoy and Barrett, on the other hand, don’t shine at all.

The allegory is obvious, two super powers providing training and arms to their preferred sides in a local war. I like the fact that there is no hand-waved “fix” for the solution. It’s a fine episode, but at this point I can’t include it in my list of favorites.

However, join me next time for Mirror, Mirror, which will certainly make my list.

[Shelby]

Mirror, Mirror

Stardate “Unknown”

This classic is one of the best-known episodes of Star Trek. We open with Kirk and a landing party on a planet attempting to negotiate dilithium mining rights with some locals, who are collectively referred to as the Halkan Council. There is some hesitation, because in spite of the Federation’s peaceful nature the Halkans could not tolerate the loss of even one life resulting from the use of their crystals. Kirk beams up to give them more time to consider. But there is a transporter malfunction as a consequence of an ion storm. The landing party finds themselves in sexy uniforms on a different Enterprise, and violence appears to be the order of the day.

Much of what makes this episode so much fun is comparing all the changes. This is an Empire rather than a Federation. There’s a big sword insignia painted everywhere in the Enterprise. The uniforms are very cool. There are daggers and “agonizers.” And Spock has a villainous goatee. You can’t get more evil than that.

To clarify, Kirk, McCoy, Scotty and Uhura are the ones who are transported to this “mirror” universe, and try to hide their true nature. The evil Spock they meet is a native. Kirk theorizes they are in a parallel universe, and surmises that their counterparts are now on our familiar Enterprise. He orders Scotty to short out the phaser banks so the Halkans in this universe aren’t slaughtered for a while, and sends a frightened Uhura to retrieve his orders from the bridge. Yes, Nichols gets a chance to act in this episode. Wish we could’ve seen my favorite, Yeoman Rand, get a chance to shine here.

Sulu, sporting a dueling scar on his face, takes the opportunity to harass Uhura until interrupted by Kirk’s arrival. Turns out Kirk is to annihilate the Halkans if they refuse to comply.

Scotty can’t access the phasers without authorization from Security Chief Sulu, even with the Captain’s orders! That’s some organizational structure, let me tell you. So Kirk gives the Halkans twelve hours to reconsider. This is a serious breach of orders, prompting astonishment from all and a threat from Spock to report the issue.

Koenig gets a chance to act too, attempting a botched assassination attempt against Kirk. Everyone’s angling to take out their superiors and advance. I would think carrying out missions would be impacted by always having to watch your back, but whatever. I live in a relatively peaceful world so what do I know?

Kirk gets the computer to give him a procedure to return to their universe, puts it on a cart and gives it to Scotty. When McCoy is asked to help he gets to use his favorite line, in this case “I’m a doctor not an engineer.” It’s still funny.



What’s even funnier is the glimpse we get of the evil four back in the normal universe. Shatner has a tour de force ranting and then trying to pay Spock off to release him from the brig. This is probably my favorite scene in the episode. Wish we could’ve spent more time watching them.

And now for the perks of captaincy. Kirk returns to his quarters and finds a lovely officer waiting for him, Marlena Moreau (Barbara Luna, who was once married to Doug McClure). She hits the button and two drinks appear immediately from a dispenser. This certainly implies some sort of fabricator, or tiny transporter technology. From way back in season one we know that there is a galley with cooks running things, so I could accept food being sent up to a little hatch. But this looks like matter created from nothing. That’s rather far ahead of what we’d expect at this point, although I believe it’s a feature of later Trek series.



Spock calls to warn Kirk that if he doesn’t comply with orders Spock will have to kill him. He warns him because Spock doesn’t really want the captaincy. After the call is ended Marlena reveals the Tantalus Field to us, Kirk’s remote assassination device and the secret of his success. Kirk refuses to use it on Spock though, puzzling Marlena.

Meanwhile Scotty says they have to leave within a half-hour or not at all. Marlena pops out of the boudoir in a lovely nightgown, anxious to please a captain who seems to have been losing interest in her. Luna does a magnificent job of acting in this episode as Marlena gets to know the new Kirk and falls for him.

Nichols gets another scene, this time “distracting” the sexed-up Sulu so he misses the alarm on his security board. She looks very seductive, and then very dangerous. It’s a good look for her.

But the suspicious Spock gets the landing party in sick bay and wants answers. There’s a fight and Kirk bashes a skull over his head. They’ve only got fifteen minutes but McCoy needs to treat Spock first or he’ll die. Marlena is using the Tantalus Field to watch all this atypical behavior and talk of getting back “home.”

Sulu shows up with some redshirts and intends to kill both Kirk and Spock, planning to take the captaincy for himself. Marlena uses the Tantalus Field on Sulu’s men and then hurries off somewhere. The landing party heads down to the transporter while McCoy remains behind to stabilize Spock, but Spock wakes up and mind-melds McCoy to learn the truth.

Marlena meets the others in the transporter room and wants to go with this new Captain Kirk who treats her right. She pulls a phaser when Kirk says she can’t come, but Uhura neatly disarms her. I really like Marlena and wish she could’ve gone along.

The power is cut and the transporter will have to be operated manually, so Scott volunteers to stay behind. When Kirk orders him onto the transporter, Scott calls him “Jim” for the only time in the series. It’s a good moment.

Spock arrives with McCoy, and the power is restored. Kirk takes one last minute to try and convince Spock to become the captain and change the Empire. It’s an amazing scene.

Kirk: In every revolution, there’s one man with a vision.



Back on our familiar Enterprise’s bridge there’s another great “banter” scene as Kirk, Spock and McCoy sling lines at each other. Then *this* universe’s Marlena Moreau walks in, shocking those who recognize her. Kirk muses that they could become “friends.” I wish it had been a recurring role. Ah, the lost opportunities.

I recall that back in the early days of fandom there were always stories set in the Mirror Universe. Some were even novel length. Maybe I can get that box of zines down from the closet and revisit them.

The whole cast does an outstanding job here. This has always been one of my favorite episodes, even though I’ve probably seen it more than any other. And I’m still not tired of it, it’s just such a great concept. Years later, the Enterprise series took a brief venture into the Mirror universe, and those were easily the best episodes they did.

So of course this episode is a favorite. Here are my cumulative lists.

Season One Favorites:
Mudd’s Women
Charlie X
The Naked Time
The Conscience of the King
The Alternative Factor
City on the Edge of Forever
Space Seed
Errand of Mercy
This Side of Paradise

Season Two Favorites:
Patterns of Force
Amok Time
The Apple
Journey to Babel
Mirror, Mirror

Quite a respectable collection. Join me next time for The Immunity Syndrome. Until then.

[Shelby]

The Immunity Syndrome

4307.1

We learn (a bit too late) that the Intrepid, another star ship like the Enterprise, was manned by Vulcans. Pity they all just suddenly died. Solar System Gamma 7a has also experienced some sort of disaster and is “dead.” This can’t be good.

Spock was devastated by their deaths, even at a great distance. He waxes poetic when McCoy seems unable to fathom the loss.

They spot a black energy-based amoeba-shaped thing and launch a probe. Cool! They hear some sort of whale-call sound, then many of the crew practically pass out as a result. Uhura gets to play one of them. Kirk is affected as well.

Kirk’s brilliant idea is to fly the Enterprise into it. This causes more of the same problems as well as engine problems. Bet you didn’t see that coming.

Kirk: This ship is in trouble.

Thanks, Jim. And it’s getting worse now that they’re inside the thing.

McCoy: I recommend survival. Let’s get out of here.

That’s his professional opinion. But Kirk’s not about to stop investigating! Even though McCoy says they’re all dying after being inside for only ten minutes.



Just a note that when we see the forward viewscreen with our helm and navigator on either side, we’re looking at the back of Sulu’s head, or some other black-haired actor, instead of the back of Lt Kyle’s blond head (Sulu is off making the Green Berets for this episode). Saving money using a shot that’s already on file, boys?

McCoy sure has a lot of nurses all of a sudden. I guess it’s good to be the ship’s doctor.

Spock decides the black field they're inside is an energy-drain shield, apparently protecting something within. I don’t recognize all the crew sitting in the briefing room, but we’ll have to assume they’re representing various departments. I wish they’d be more consistent about this sort of thing. We just have to wink-wink and assume there’s a lot of turnover among the crew.

Spock tells us that no Vulcan can conceive of being conquered, because of their history. (So much for the hints from season one that Earth had conquered Vulcan.) He only felt astonishment from the crew of the Intrepid as they died. That’s what I call ego. I guess this is what the episode title references. The Vulcans imagined they'd be immune, right up until their final seconds of life.



The thing in the center of the black amoeba shape is a brightly-colored amoeba shape. So they launch another probe. And learn that it really IS a space amoeba! The special effects are psychedelic. Gotta love the sixties.

Somehow our top three characters end up deciding that they can find its vulnerable spots by flying a shuttlecraft inside it rather than firing more probes. But of course that's a suicide mission. Spock gets some nasty lines accusing McCoy of having a martyr complex.

Kirk agonizes over who to send, making a personal log as follows.

Kirk: Which of my friends do I condemn to death?

It’s a little strange watching this supposed rivalry between Spock and McCoy both as they vie for the assignment, and their later bickering after Kirk chooses Spock. Not sure how well this characterization holds up against what we already know about them, because they’re being awfully harsh. At this point in the show Spock has already called Kirk and McCoy his closest friends, back during Spock's Pon Farr. And McCoy had said he was honored to stand with Spock at the wedding. Well anyway, right before he takes off Spock asks McCoy to wish him luck, but the Vulcan leaves before he hears McCoy's response.

Spock of course immediately martyrs himself by transferring additional power to his shields, prolonging his data-acquisition time at the expense of having enough energy to escape. He tries to give them the information they will need but he’s dying and the message is garbled. They do receive one line clearly though.

Spock: Tell Dr McCoy that he should’ve wished me luck.

Kirk and McCoy wax philisophic but we get a good line from McCoy.

McCoy: Here we are antibodies of our own galaxy attacking an invading germ.

This gives Kirk the idea for the Enterprise to act as an antibody and penetrate the inner amoeba’s body. (Hoping that this is what Spock was trying to tell them in his garbled message.) So maybe this is where the title comes from? I dunno. I like the "egotistical Vulcan" explanation better.

Kirk decides to use an anti-matter charge against the nucleus. We find that Spock is still alive and recording a final message for posterity. He refers to the Enterprise as the finest star ship in the fleet. It’s a good moment. We cut to Kirk making a similar recording of commendations for his officers.

This is the kind of schmaltz that Trek fans love. Sadly the creature destroys everything without a trace, and communications aren't getting out, so it's kind of wasted effort.

The Enterprise passes near Spock's shuttlecraft on their way out and grabs the still-living Spock in a tractor beam. Their anti-matter charge goes off and the monster has been destroyed! What a relief.

I don’t really feel any peril while watching, but I’ve seen this episode many, many times. Some of the arguing works, but a lot of it comes off flat or out of character. Bits of Trek trivia come up that are nice to hear. It’s a ship-board episode, but with a few shuttlecraft scenes and the special effects of the amoeba and its black field, so maybe the budget evened out. Except Sulu didn’t draw pay and they got a Level-C character as a stand-in on helm.

Anyway, I can’t list this one as a favorite, but it's still a good episode. Next up will be I, Mudd, which will definitely make the favorite list! Until then.

[Shelby]

I, Mudd

4513.3

Welcome back! Time to persevere with my re-watch, if only for my own amusement. It’s been too long since I’ve watched my favorite show. Even though the process of putting together these posts extends the requisite time, I just can’t see myself abandoning the effort. So tonight we have the return of Harry Mudd, an event not to be missed!

We open with McCoy and Spock in a corridor as the new Lt Norman walks by. McCoy finds something wrong with the man because he doesn’t smile or discuss his past. Spock takes these comments personally, and although McCoy tries to apologize it doesn’t end well. I have no recollection of ever seeing this scene before – I love when that happens, it’s like a gift!

Norman pops into auxiliary control, subdues the crewman on duty, and changes the ship’s course. Kirk (in a wrap-around tunic) can’t regain control of the ship and calls “Emergency Manual Monitor,” which is apparently a station located on a balcony in engineering. We cut there and see that Norman’s already subdued that crewman too. Next the renegade subdues Scotty and the entire engineering staff on duty, and makes his way to the bridge. He informs Kirk that he’s taken control of the Enterprise and is sending it somewhere because “they” need it. Then he opens a panel in his torso to show that he is an android. And we cut to titles.

It’s a little far-fetched to accept that one guy, even an android, is so invulnerable that he can plow his way through the Enterprise and take over the ship. Aren’t there sufficient precautions in place? Can't anyone shoot him with a phaser? It makes our heroes into paper tigers.

When we come back Kirk asks who sent him and Norman replies “I am not programmed to respond in that area.” That catchphrase will be repeated many times in this episode. Next, Norman turns himself off, standing right there on the bridge. They’ll have to wait four days to find out their destination.

Turns out it’s a previously-uncharted planet. Norman awakens and orders several specific characters to beam down. Kirk resists and Norman announces that their engines will be destroyed if he refuses. C’mon, all these ultimatums are just a little much to endure, and throw us out of our imaginary setting. In four days they weren’t able to regain control of the ship? There was no one actively opposing them.

Beaming down with Norman are Kirk, Spock, McCoy, Uhura and Chekov, whose hair looks good this time. He’s earning his paycheck. Sulu was on the bridge earlier but we won’t be seeing him planetside. Typical Trek underground installation with walls that are half “stone” and half finished. SMH. Norman says this is a Class K world (as opposed to Class M goldilocks worlds). We enter a throne room with many identical elegant female androids (the “Alice” series) and find our old pal Harry Mudd, or rather Emperor Mudd. Chekov doesn’t know him, which is cute because of course in Wrath of Khan we pretended that he was somewhere on the Enterprise back in Space Seed.



Anyway Kirk rants and demands and Mudd holds his ground, laughing when he says they’ll all spend the rest of their lives on this planet. Really well-acted scene, by the way, Roger Carmel is terrific. We cut to commercial and get the explanation when we return. Mudd escaped his situation at the end of season one’s Mudd’s Women episode and ended up here on a planet of androids who grant his every wish. They also want to study humans, so won’t let him leave until he provides them with replacements. Thus the capture of Enterprise.

The next bit of amusement is an android duplicate of Harry’s nagging wife, Stella. He had her built just so he could tell her to shut up, and get the last word. It’s a pretty funny bit.

Alone with the androids, Kirk learns their origin. Their masters were “The Makers” from Andromeda. They died out long ago. Mudd has given them purpose again. The scene degenerates into classic Trek humor as Kirk tells the androids to leave because he doesn’t like them. Then everyone in the party says they’re in trouble. The only useful thought is Spock’s, that there must be a central control. Kirk sends everyone off to learn what they can.

Spock follows Norman, who’s changed into a onesie, directly to their central control. That was quick. When Spock questions him Norman isn’t programmed to respond in that area. Told you. Oh, all the androids wear a numbered necklace. While Norman is not responding, his necklace blinks. Food for thought.

Mudd shows Kirk and Uhura more female android models he designed, and they “tempt” Uhura with an android body that would last for 500,000 years. Eternal beauty. I’m sure she’s only pretending to be interested, right?

McCoy is overjoyed with the planet’s research facilities. Scott is dragged in and tossed across the room by an Alice, and Mudd tells Kirk his entire crew is now on the planet and Enterprise is manned by androids. Kirk doesn’t take it well.

So we have another planet where Kirk’s crew can have anything they want “simply by asking for it.” The usual Trek problem. We should all have such threats.

And another scene I don’t remember! Thanks to those syndication editors, curse their hides! Chekov banters with a pair of Alices and learns that the lecherous Harry Mudd designed the girls to be real human females. He gets a delighted grin after his outrage, nudge-nudge wink-wink.

Scotty goes gaga over the workshops. Kirk gives everyone a dressing-down, a gilded cage is still a cage. An Alice joins them and Kirk demands the Enterprise, a beautiful lady that they love. He’s messing with computers again, another skill he has. Alice’s necklace blinks and she asks all units to relay and Norman to coordinate. Ah HA!

Next Kirk confronts a giddy Mudd, who’s preparing to leave. But Mudd is shocked when the androids refuse to take him along. Norman states that they always knew Mudd was unusually flawed, even for a human. They only used him, but will no longer obey him. They will go and “serve” the greedy and dangerous humans, who need “help” and must be "cared for." Ah ha, benevolent dictatorship, how refreshing.

As the humans (including a distraught Harry Mudd) discuss what to do next, Spock works out that there is only one Norman, who coordinates the thinking of all the other individual androids, forming one mind. Kirk decides to “overload” Norman with illogic. Yep, here goes Kirk again, bane of computers everywhere.

Kirk tells an Alice that Harry is dying and needs medical equipment from the ship. They’ve knocked Harry out to make it look good. But Uhura reveals the trick, because she wants an android body. Alice promises they’ll have hers ready before they leave. Kirk comes towards Uhura, grabs her, and then everyone praises her performance! Bet you didn’t see that coming! It was a clever ruse, giving the androids the escape attempt that was no doubt expected.



Now Kirk takes the Alices to Wonderland. The crew performs a series of nonsense skits, provoking necklaces to blink until the Alices freeze up. Spock tries a Vulcan nerve-pinch on an Alice but gets no response, which is pretty funny. He reverts to illogic. The group moves to the control center and we have more illogical statements, more blinking necklaces. Norman asks Spock to explain, and Spock replies:

Logic is a little tweeting bird,
chirping in a meadow.
Logic is a wreath of pretty flowers,
which smell bad.

Gotta love it. Then Spock presents an invisible explosive, pitches it to Harry, who detonates it and everyone reels. The Alices are done for, but Norman persists. Kirk tells him everything Harry says is a lie, and Harry calmly states “I am lying.”

This is too much for Norman, who begins to smoke. He asks the humans to explain and Kirk takes great delight in replying, “I am not programmed to respond in that area.” Oh, sweet victory.

Next scene Kirk explains that the androids have been reprogrammed to make the planet useful, but Harry is condemned to remain with them as an example of an irritant. He has to stay until he is no longer an irritant. He gazes at several female androids and comments on the positives. Then Kirk says they’ve had a special android designed just to take care of him. Poor Harry is aghast when he sees they’ve built five hundred models of his wife Stella!



One of the best of the lighthearted Trek episodes, pretty much a guarantee with the presence of Roger Carmel as Harry Mudd. Did you know he was also supposed to be in The Trouble with Tribbles, our next episode? At least, I believe that’s what author David Gerrold has said. Cyrano Jones was created as a replacement. Anyway, Carmel’s a huge man, especially standing next to our cast members.

Everyone but Sulu and Chapel got to be silly in this one. They really pulled it off well. It’s more androids, as in What Are Little Girls Made Of, another “paradise” as in This Side of Paradise, and more of “humans in captivity” as in The Menagerie. Only the presence of Harry Mudd, signaling an evening of comedy, elevates this one beyond the level of repetitive story themes.

As I threatened, this goes on my list of favorites.

Season One Favorites:
Mudd’s Women
Charlie X
The Naked Time
The Conscience of the King
The Alternative Factor
City on the Edge of Forever
Space Seed
Errand of Mercy
This Side of Paradise

Season Two Favorites:
Patterns of Force
Amok Time
The Apple
Journey to Babel
Mirror, Mirror
I, Mudd

Next episode in stardate order is The Trouble with Tribbles. See you next time!

[Shelby]

The Trouble with Tribbles

4523.3

Here we are with the best of the comic Trek episodes. Written by David Gerrold, who would go on to have a successful career. I remember reading the book he wrote about his experience with this script. As I hear the dialogue I can’t help but remember reading and re-reading that book. So I’ve heard these playful jokes in the beginning so many times that I only barely crack a smile. Pity I’m so jaded, but I remember absolutely loving this episode when I had to wait until I happened to catch a broadcast.

Interesting that Station K-7 issues a Priority One distress call, prompting the Enterprise to roar in with guns blazing ready to engage hostile Klingons. But Mr Lurry is only a station manager, apparently a civilian. Seems a little, I dunno, excessive for him to have such power, and surprising to have a civilian station in a disputed area.



Ah ha. It’s Under-Secretary Nilz Baris who has that authority. We’re back to our usual Trek disdain for government officials. He’s got a supercilious expression, a nasal drone and a habit of lording it over all others. Oh, and a fawning underling in one Arne Darvin. They want that quadrotriticale protected!

Let me just draw your attention to the exquisite lighting. Note how the light-colored walls appear in various pastel shades as a result. It really is genius, there’s never been anything like it before or since.

And we get another space trader, in a non-material economy. This is Cyrano Jones, played by Stanley Adams. He gives a tribble to Uhura and off we go.

Admiral Fitzpatrick comes on the viewer to yell at Kirk for taking Mr Baris lightly. The interesting point is that on the wall behind the admiral is the arrow pointing off to one side that we see on the side of the Enterprise’s secondary hull and engine nacelles. I suspect that makes it a more suitable insignia for Starfleet than the Enterprise patch that got used for everything in later years (instead of simply representing Enterprise).

Anyway, next we get to meet Klingon Captain Koloth, played by William Campbell. You remember him from The Squire of Gothos, right? You might be a little shocked that these Klingons aren’t dark-complexioned like those in Errand of Mercy, nor do they have bifurcated eyebrows. I believe I’ve read that the make-up department forgot how they’d presented them earlier, so this wasn’t intentional. On the other hand it’s certainly plausible that Klingons come in varied colors, so no foul.

The Klingons have come for shore leave rights as per the Organian Treaty, and we learn that they’re hoping to meet some friendly females while they’re here. Ahem, vive la différence.

The tribbles are reproducing already, and we learn that Scotty loves to relax with a good ol’ technical journal (on a viewer of course). He gets sent down to prevent trouble on shore leave, so of course he starts a bar room fight. Awesome insults.

And I’d just like to say that everyone in this episode displays the best comedic chops anyone could ask for. What a cast. I also love the special music we hear whenever the screen is filled with tribbles. Best damn soundtrack ever.

Note that there is a “maintenance crew” that Kirk tasks with clearing the ship of tribbles. Space janitor. My mother wanted me to be a doctor, but I wound up here.

We definitely see “food processors” in this episode. Kirk and Spock each stick one of the meal cards into a slot to get their food. Scotty suspects the tribbles got into the machinery through one of the air vents. Since the trays come out with food plus tribbles, it’s safe to say that these aren’t actual “food replicators” as in later series. Still, it must be quite a system, even without tiny transporter beams or 3-D food printers.



Kirk gets buried under a pile of tribbles, and it’s still funny. Oh no, the grain has poisoned the tribbles! And soon enough we find out that Darvin is a Klingon agent, and as Baris’ aide he’s been in a perfect position for nefariousness!



Poor Cyrano is condemned to 17.9 years picking up tribbles. And the Klingons get an engine room full of tribbles themselves, which they will slaughter mercilessly. That’s worth a hearty laugh as the Enterprise zooms off to our triumphant music.

If I had the opportunity to show just one episode from the original series to someone, it would be, well, not this one. But if I got to show them two, this would be one of them. Obviously it goes on my favorites list. So here’s the current list.

Season One Favorites:
Mudd’s Women
Charlie X
The Naked Time
The Conscience of the King
The Alternative Factor
City on the Edge of Forever
Space Seed
Errand of Mercy
This Side of Paradise

Season Two Favorites:
Patterns of Force
Amok Time
The Apple
Journey to Babel
Mirror, Mirror
I, Mudd
The Trouble with Tribbles

So far only two comic episodes on the list: I, Mudd and Tribbles. However, our next episode will be A Piece of the Action! See you then, trekkies.

[Shelby]

A Piece of the Action

4598

The Enterprise arrives a hundred years after a ship called the Horizon visited the planet Iotia. This was before the “non-interference directive” went into effect. Hm, where did we encounter this concept before? I think in A Private Little War, and then again in The Apple. Did I miss one? Anyway what a set-up!

When Kirk, Spock and McCoy arrive in the transporter room the guy at the console hands them phasers, communicators, and what looks like a medical pouch for McCoy. The gear was just stacked awkwardly on the console. That can’t be how things are supposed to work! But this way we get foreshadowing. Spock is saying that the Iotians are intelligent and imitative. If you can’t guess or you don’t already know, I’ll remind you at the end.

So the boys beam down and you would think they’d react to being in a city much like what they encountered in City on the Edge of Forever. But instead they just make with the dry humor. Ah well, lack of continuity.

The landing party is held at gunpoint until they give up their gear to mobsters. They witness a drive-by hit and end up in the office of Bela Okmyx. He’s the boss of the largest territory in the world, one of a dozen big bosses – not counting the “small fry.” Krako (played by the fabulous Vic Tayback) is the rival mobster behind the hit they just witnessed. Anyway, the Iotians have modeled their society on a book they got from the Horizon about 1920s Chicago mobsters. Oh dear, it’s the “contamination.”

Okmyx wants a hundred phasers (“heaters”) so he can take over the world. When Kirk refuses the boys are held hostage in a warehouse. Spock says Okmyx is right in that a united rule would be preferable to chaos, and Kirk says it’s the Federation’s responsibility to fix things.

Kirk makes up a card game called Fizban. The guards get wrapped up in his instructions and as a result the boys overpower them. I’ll just mention that back at a 1970s Star Trek convention I purchased a deck of Fizban cards along with a rules pamphlet. Never managed to get a Royal Fizban myself though; after all, the odds are astronomical.

Spock and McCoy use a local radio station to get beamed back up. Another scene I don’t remember seeing. Meanwhile Kirk gets abducted by Krako’s gang. Krako offers Kirk a third right off the top if he’ll supply the heaters, but Kirk isn’t even tempted a little bit. What a guy.



Okmyx calls Spock and offers to help get Kirk back, so they beam down again. With pistol-phasers this time! But of course it’s just a trick so Okmyx can recapture them. Kirk busts in and the tables are once-again turned!

And now Kirk plays gangster. This is what makes this episode so good. He’s gonna put the bag on Krako! Gangster-talk is awesome. He makes the gangsters give their clothes to him and Spock, and now we get Gangster Spock! I love this. Poor Kirk has to drive a stick, and Spock tells him that as a taxi driver he leaves much to be desired. Everybody’s a critic.



A street-kid causes a distraction so the boys can subdue Krako’s guards. Kirk promises the kid “a piece of the action” in return, and thus we get the episode title. Sadly our heroes get jumped again, but Kirk goes into full mob-boss mode from this point on. He announces that the Federation is taking over and they’ll cut Krako in for a piece of the action. Mwaa-ha-haaa. Then Kirk surprises Krako by beaming him up to the ship.

Everybody ends up back at Okmyx’ office and they beam all the other bosses in for negotiations. Meanwhile Krako’s men arrive outside and there’s a firefight that ends when Scotty stuns the entire block. Nicely done, Scotty.



So Okmyx heads the new syndicate and the Federation will arrive each year to collect their forty percent. Back on the bridge Spock wonders how Kirk will explain collecting their annual “cut.” But to hearken back to our start, McCoy confesses that he left his communicator in Okmyx’ office. Prompting Kirk’s fear that the Iotians will learn the technology and demand a piece of their action!

I love this episode so much. Obviously it goes on my list of favorites.

Season One Favorites:
Mudd’s Women
Charlie X
The Naked Time
The Conscience of the King
The Alternative Factor
City on the Edge of Forever
Space Seed
Errand of Mercy
This Side of Paradise

Season Two Favorites:
Patterns of Force
Amok Time
The Apple
Journey to Babel
Mirror, Mirror
I, Mudd
The Trouble with Tribbles
A Piece of the Action

Next time we’ll be watching By Any Other Name. Until then.

[Shelby]

By Any Other Name

4657.5

I remembered the basics of this episode before beginning my re-watch. Of course my stand-out memory is the fabulous Barbara Bouchet (who you might remember from 1967’s Casino Royale), barely wearing one of my favorite Trek costumes. God bless costume designer Bill Theiss.

We open with a landing party beaming down to a very pretty planet, in answer to a distress signal. A man and a woman (Bouchet) appear and demand that Kirk surrender his ship. They zap everyone with a paralyzation weapon, and tell them they’ll all be heading out of the galaxy on the Enterprise. Well OK, we’ve established this episode’s conflict!

When we come back from break, the lead alien (“Rojan”) gives us more info. They’re Kelvans from Andromeda, which will become uninhabitable in ten millennia. Our galaxy looks just great to them, so they will conquer it. Sucks to be you, humans.

There follow a few brief scenes of aliens taking over the Enterprise. Chekhov’s here, still no Sulu. Blooper: Scotty orders a red alert but the big red lights are already blinking. ;-) Back on the planet Kirk lets us know it would take thousands of years to reach Andromeda. Rojan explains it will only take three hundred years to get there once they’ve modified the engines. Wow, bet Scotty will be impressed. Note that the aliens have their own “transporter” technology; one guy just pops out of the Enterprise and pops back onto the planet surface.

More infodump. Rojan says their own vessel was damaged by the galactic barrier, which is why they need Enterprise. Oh, and it’s going to be a multi-generational journey back to Andromeda. My story-sense is tingling. Ooh, and here comes the kicker. The aliens have assumed human form because the Enterprise is designed to support this sort of life. But they’re not used to all the feelings, the sensations. Pity, because Trek has done this before (Catspaw), and will again. But I suppose this is the poster-child of episodes for that theme.



The rocky cave interior where the landing party is held looks terrible. It’s all shiny like it’s made of slick waterproof tarps, or garbage bags. But hey, at least it’s a different look from the “Trek rocks” that we usually get. Kirk refers to their captivity on Eminiar 7, which was in the first season episode A Taste of Armageddon. Neat. Hard to do in episodic television when shows can be aired in any order, but it comes off OK, giving you all the info you need to understand. Anyway, they lure Bouchet (“Kelinda”) into their cell and Kirk knocks her out! What a cad. After their inevitable recapture the Andromedans turn two of the crew into twenty-sided dice, then crush one! (It’s the yeoman, played by Lee J. Cobb’s daughter Julie. Eh, she wasn’t such a good actress anyway.) So we’re trying to establish stakes, but honestly I can’t relate to being turned into a polyhedron and crushed.



Back on the ship Spock and Scotty try to jam the alien power source plugged into Engineering, but they can’t because it’s protected by some super-metal casing. So Spock and Scotty work on a self-destruct option instead. When the time comes, Kirk doesn’t give the self-destruct order. Turns out the Kelvans had disabled it anyway.

DAMN! There ARE “food synthesizers” to “manufacture” food! Even though they’re not “replicators,” there is more to feeding the crew than the cook from season one putting fake turkeys in ovens on Thanksgiving. Maybe the synthesizers just make raw materials like textured vegetable protein, but still. I’m very disappointed.

So now everybody gets turned into a polyhedron except Kirk, Spock, McCoy and Scotty. And they’re eating play-doh cubes, so I guess we’re rationing supplies already. Those cubes look good to Tomar, one of the Andromedans. His obvious enjoyment cues Spock in to the aliens being unfamiliar with the sensations and emotions they get from their new human bodies. Bet you can guess where this is going.



We see Scotty’s cabin for the first time as he gets Tomar drunk. Scott’s appreciation of liquor has become a running gag, and this sequence is a highlight. This is one reason why I love the original Star Trek – the beloved characters. Kirk, that lucky dog, finds Kelinda alone and puts the moves on her. He says he wants to apologize for hitting her earlier, and kisses her. She calmly asks if he’s trying to seduce her, and his expression is priceless. She decides to give him a kiss anyway and Rojan walks in on them. Rojan asks if there’s a problem. Kirk replies, “Not when I came in!” and leaves with a grin. Har har har. Spock encourages Rojan’s jealousy. Eventually Rojan leaps at Kirk and fights him with his bare hands. Mid-battle Kirk points out that Rojan is becoming human, and when they arrive in Andromeda in three hundred years they will BE aliens to their people. Rojan agrees to become colonists instead of conquerors. Kelinda decides to stay with Rojan; a wise decision since Kirk isn’t the greatest steady boyfriend material.

So here’s my first big ish. The Kelvan’s own ship was irreparably damaged crossing the galactic barrier around our galaxy. With their super-science they couldn’t have prepped their own ship better? Then they steal the Enterprise for the journey back. How come they’re not worried that IT will get smashed too? There’s no mention of this, or any preventive efforts that might be necessary. Since DC Fontana co-wrote this ep, I’m rather disappointed.

Secondary ish. Rojan made clear that the Kelvans are conquerors, which is why he initially refused Kirk’s suggestions of peace and assistance. With attitude. But now Rojan is becoming human, which is why he changes his mind by the end of the episode. However, when the robot messenger ship from the Federation arrives at the Kelvan Empire in three hundred years offering friendship and an invitation to come and colonize some worlds, what do YOU think is gonna happen? That’s right, they’ve only put off the invasion. Sure hope the Federation can defend itself better in six hundred years...

If this were the first time I’d seen this, or even the third, it might get on my favorites list. It’s got drama, humor, lore, and character development. But fifty-plus years later, it just makes me smile.

Next time we’ll watch The Ultimate Computer. (Hint, it’s not an Apple.)

[Shelby]

The Ultimate Computer

4729.4

The Enterprise is summoned to a space station without any explanation. Commodore Wesley (played by Barry Russo, who also played the only actual head of security we ever saw on the Enterprise back in Devil in the Dark) beams aboard to explain. All but twenty of Kirk’s crew will remain on the station, and a Dr Daystrom (played by Blacula star William Marshall) will beam aboard with the M-5 computer. M-5 is being field-tested, and will be in control of the Enterprise. There will be several tasks including war games against a Star Fleet task force. Spock points out that Dr Daystrom is the designer behind all of a star ship’s computers.

Back from the break and we’re already in space with the M-5. We meet Dr Daystrom, who is very tall! and very emphatic about how awesome his computer is. He’s also very protective of it, and more than a little defensive. Apparently there were four previous models that didn’t quite work out. Also it would appear that he’s having a tough time surpassing his prior achievements. Sounds like a recipe for disaster!



Kirk: There are certain things men must do to remain men. Your computer would take that away.

Sulu is finally back on the bridge with Chekhov. Kirk repeatedly spars with Daystrom over how much control he’ll relinquish to the M-5, while Daystrom delights in needling Kirk for being “non-essential.” Spock, traitor that he is, supports Daystrom. Although after the computer performs well in a surprise war game attack our Vulcan reassures Kirk.

Spock: Computers make excellent and efficient servants, but I have no wish to serve under them.

I’m not so sure that sentiment helps, Spocko. Especially when Wesley calls up to congratulate “Captain Dunsel.” Everyone but McCoy looks apprehensively at Kirk as he stiffly exits the bridge without a word. McCoy keeps asking what it means until Spock explains that a dunsel is a part that serves no useful purpose.



Kirk and McCoy get a couple chances for conversation in this episode, revealing more of Kirk’s character as he searches his soul. That’s always a good thing. The good doctor mixes up a pair of Finagle’s Folly cocktails, and Kirk quotes from John Masefield’s poem Sea-Fever.

Kirk: All I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by.

They’re interrupted when the M-5 identifies a robot ore-freighter, speeds up and photon-torpedoes it to hell. Kirk and the crew weren’t able to disengage the computer this time. Daystrom is summoned but can only respond that there appears to be a defect in the control panel. Kirk calls off the tests and orders a return to the space station.

Kirk: Come along, Dr Daystrom. M-5 is out of a job!

Turns out that’s wishful thinking. When they show up in Engineering M-5 blasts Kirk across the room with a force field that Daystrom says he didn’t even know it had! Worse yet; when Scotty and an ensign go to disconnect its power, it fries the poor ensign! Daystrom says there’s nothing he can do. I’d say that’s grounds for throwing him in the brig!



Spock says the M-5 isn’t being logical. McCoy asks him not to say it’s “fascinating,” so Spock uses the word “interesting” instead. McCoy rolls his eyes. Oh dear, sophomoric humor from DC Fontana.

Scotty and Spock run off to disconnect M-5 from a Jeffries tube. McCoy goes to confront Daystrom. The guy’s not even trying to disconnect the computer, he likens it to a child who is learning. So much for that ensign’s life. Can you see where this is going?

Have you ever noticed how different doors on the Enterprise are different colors? Red, blue, grey? I’ve never figured out if there’s a consistent pattern to that.

Daystrom goes nuts when they disconnect the M-5 from the ship’s systems. But as Spock says, they have been “pursuing a wild goose.” M-5 had already re-routed around them. When confronted, Daystrom admits that the M-5 thinks like a human, that’s his new approach. Oh joy, because the war games task force is approaching now.

M-5 starts murdering the other ships. No one seems to mention the other ships raising their shields, so they get cut to pieces. What the hell?

Daystrom reveals that he used his own engrams to create the M-5’s intelligence (“of course”), so Spock suggests it would trust him. He only tries talking the thing down once they hear Wesley radioing for permission to destroy Enterprise. What a jerk.

M-5 responds with the memorable phrase “This unit must survive.” Daystrom has a melt-down ranting to the M-5 about how he gave it the ability to defend itself so no one could hurt it. He’s such a whack-job. William Marshall is one hell of an actor though. He made quite an impression on me even when I was young. Now as an adult I can only admire him more.

Finally Spock has to nerve-pinch Daystrom. Then Wesley gets permission to destroy our heroes. Now it really IS a threat against M-5. Kirk pulls one of his patented “psych-out the computer” routines, convincing M-5 that as a murderer, it must die. So M-5 shuts everything off to commit suicide. Kirk gives a rousing speech to his eighteen crewmen about how they’ll be saving a thousand lives in exchange for their own. But it doesn’t happen. They disconnect M-5 and Scotty can give them shields, but restoring communications will take too long. Kirk has them keep their shields down. He gambles on Wesley’s compassion, and it pays off.

Oops, script screw-up. They don’t have the M-5 anymore, and they’ve already said they can’t operate the star ship with so few crewmembers aboard. I guess they had to borrow some from the other three ships (because everyone on the fourth ship was killed). Oh yeah, and they have their usual amusing banter as we close, in spite of the hundreds of dead bodies in the vicinity. Shame on you, Fontana!

Nonetheless, this was a heavy, heavy episode. Very serious, very tense. The themes include:

Being replaced by a machine.
The value of a man.
Never being able to surpass an achievement early in life.
Character development.

I can’t believe how much this story resonates with me, even after having watched it so many times. It’s got to go on the Favorites list. So here’s where we stand.

Season One Favorites:
Mudd’s Women
Charlie X
The Naked Time
The Conscience of the King
The Alternative Factor
City on the Edge of Forever
Space Seed
Errand of Mercy
This Side of Paradise

Season Two Favorites:
Patterns of Force
Amok Time
The Apple
Journey to Babel
Mirror, Mirror
I, Mudd
The Trouble with Tribbles
A Piece of the Action
The Ultimate Computer

Next up will be Return to Tomorrow. See you then.

[Shelby]

Return to Tomorrow

4768.3

Hello and welcome back! I note that it’s been a year since my last Trek re-watch. That’s what comes of working in a vacuum. (See what I did there?)

No Chekov today, and Uhura has a different hair style. They’re hundreds of light years further than anyone has ever explored, following a distress signal, when the Enterprise comes upon a planet. Earthlike, but its atmosphere was “ripped away” long ago. Suddenly a deep voice from nowhere announces that he’s Sargon, the one who called them. And if they don’t help him, what happened to them will happen to “all of Mankind.” That’s kinda portentous. Or is it pretentious?

After the break Kirk sends a message to Starfleet. Uhura tells us it will take three weeks to get there. Nice. Turns out Sargon is 100 miles deep inside the planet, and wants them to beam down to save them. He hurries to say that he can make it possible for their transporter to reach that deep. Interesting to know. Also, Spock’s sensors can reach that deep, so why not the transporter?

Ominously, when Kirk tells Spock he’ll have to stay behind Sargon kills all ship’s power. When Kirk changes his mind power is restored. That’s blackmail and we don’t like blackmail. Apparently Kirk doesn’t have those scruples though.

And we meet Dr Ann Mulhall, Asrobiology. Played by Diana Muldaur, and this won’t be her first rodeo at the ol’ Star Trek ranch. What’s an astrobiologist doing in a red uniform with an Engineering insignia? Idiots. Anyway, it becomes apparent that Sargon manipulated her into joining the landing party. Everybody shrugs that off but honestly I don’t play that way.

Sargon beams down Kirk, Spock, McCoy and Mulhall, leaving behind the two Security redshirts. In the third branch of our trifecta, Kirk can use his communicator to contact the ship through 100 miles of rock, which he also shouldn’t be able to do. All this hand-waving is taking me out of the story, guys.

Anyway one wall of the chamber opens up to plastic rocks and reveals Sargon, a glowy sphere that contains the essence of a man. He says that 6,000 centuries ago their vessels were colonizing the galaxy; Sargon thinks the Enterprise crew could be their descendants.

But that doesn’t stop him from snatching Kirk’s body, prompting McCoy! to pull his phaser! Have I ever seen that happen?! Anyway, Shatner gets the chance to act as Sargon exults in wearing a body once more. I can just hear the wanks making jokes, but you look at that performance and realize what an actor really is. Shatner got the big bucks and this is why. He really, really emotes Sargon’s triumph.

I must note that Spock and Mulhall persist in stupidly holding their tricorders backwards when they use them, while McCoy uses his correctly. I really want to slap somebody at this point. Back to the story, Kirk is stuck in the sphere, and Kirk’s body’s temperature and heart rate are increased such that he will soon die if Sargon doesn’t leave. Sargon responds that he not only wants Kirk but also Spock and Mulhall, because there are two more “receptacles” in the next room that need bodies too. “So that we may live again!” And, to another break.

See? I was right all along. Big mistake!

Well, now dude says we misunderstood. They only want our bodies long enough to build themselves robot bodies of their own. Then Kirk practically dies as he overheats, and Sargon returns to his glowy sphere.

Back in the briefing room Kirk insists that all four of them, plus Scotty, must unanimously agree to proceed. McCoy demands to know the answer to a simple “why?” Kirk replies with a speech that winds up with this famous line, “Risk – risk is our business!” I dunno, Sargon already said that his race almost destroyed themselves because they’d become so powerful they felt they were gods. He also mentioned that his wife was one of the other two survivors along with the leader of the “opposition” in their armageddon battle. What could go wrong?



When Henoch takes over Spock’s body, he hops around grinning and emoting (to Chapel’s delight). It’s pretty funny. Ominous though, as his second comment is to wonder why the superior Vulcans never conquered Humanity. Sargon and his wife Thalassa don’t last much longer than a kiss before they have to vacate, but Henoch says he’ll concoct a metabolic reduction shot or something so they can return. Sure you will, Henoch.

Called it! Kirk won’t get the correct formula and thus Sargon will die, leaving Henoch able to keep Spock’s body. As Christine Chapel stupidly reveals that she sees what’s happening, Henoch uses a Vulcan mind trick to make her forget. By the way, I think Nimoy is enjoying his opportunity to play a different personality too.



Henoch taunts Thalassa that she’ll soon have robot hands and not the “taste of life.” Soon we see she has let her hair down and looks thoughtful. Henoch shows up like the Serpent of Eden, taunting her; and revealing that there is a better way! Yeah well, I don’t think Mulhall’s body can survive like a Vulcan’s could. But maybe Henoch wants to capture a hot little Vulcan missy for Mulhall to wear? Gee, I wonder what T’Pring’s up to right now?

Henoch: Would you prefer… THIS? (referring to the robot body)
Thalassa: No! I’m beginning to hate it!

Damn!

Thalassa runs to Sargon, trying to convince him the bodies will grow accustomed to them, but Sargon collapses. McCoy arrives in time to deliver his favorite line, “He’s dead.” And, to the break.

I am reminded of a producer I once worked with who got very upset that others weren’t working “to the break.” Yep, it’s important all right.

Oh look, here’s a nurse we haven’t seen before and probably won’t see again. I wish they’d kept the characters recurring. Not the first time I’ve said that.

Henoch is still taunting Thalassa, what an evil guy! Now they’ve got a robot completed, but she says “No! I cannot live in that thing!”

She goes to bargain with McCoy, telling him she’ll save Kirk if he plays along that she’s actually Mulhall so she can keep the body. When he refuses she torments him with a thought. Too bad Kelly isn’t up to writhing in pain, he just looks silly.

But Thalassa has learned her lesson and asks McCoy for forgiveness. Her reward? Sargon lives, he is in the Enterprise.

What follows is a whole switcheroo and McCoy gives the tyrant Henoch an injection, scaring him into fleeing to oblivion. Spock returns to his body, having been sharing space with Nurse Chapel.

Sargon announces that he and Thalassa are going to fade to oblivion too. Kirk and Mulhall give them the chance for one last kiss before they go. Everyone looks on all “isn’t it romantic.”

Guys, they’re dead. Chips cashed in, after hanging on for half a million years with nothing but hope. It’s not romantic, it’s a tragedy.

Anyway, let’s ruminate on this episode. Shatner and Nimoy had fun. Doohan had a few good scenes. Muldaur gave a fine performance too.

There’s something about hubris here. I suppose there’s also something about trying to hold on past your time, but I’m not sure I’m buying that.

I’m struggling because I’ve seen this one so many times. As a result it comes off as predictable to me. I think they did a fine job on it but I feel it narrowly missing my current list of favorites. Sorry guys.

Next on the list is The Omega Glory. See you then!

[Shelby]

The Omega Glory

Stardate: Unknown

The cold open begins with the Enterprise arriving at planet Omega IV. The USS Exeter is in orbit, which is commanded by Captain Ron Tracey. Getting no response to a hail, they beam over to investigate and find empty uniforms with little white crystals spilling out. Oops.

Oh look, here’s Lt. Galloway, one of the recurring extras. Anyway, they replay a log entry and are warned that they’ve contracted whatever killed the crew and can’t go back to their own ship or they’ll spread it. They’re told to get down to the planet, as it’s their only chance.

I’d just like to point out that here’s an example of the Federation background, that each of the twelve starships in Starfleet have their own uniform insignia. Just like the various other insignias we’ve seen and noted through the course of this rewatch. This was a given back in the old days, where you’d often see all twelve starship insignia designs represented and labeled. This was later retconned. F you, retconners.

We arrive on the planet in a small village and witness a bunch of Chinese-types about to execute a white couple dressed in “barbarian” skins. Captain Tracey appears and stops the execution. He explains that the Chinese-types are Kohms, and the barbarians are Yangs. Yangs are savages, impossible to communicate with. We hear them growl instead of speaking.

We also get the mysterious disease spiel. You’ll survive it only if you stay on the planet, as Tracey has. But more importantly, Kirk tells us through VO that Tracey may be interfering in the planet’s evolution – a violation of the Prime Directive. Wow, that never happens.

By the way, Tracey is played by Morgan Woodward, the actor who played Dr van Gelder in Dagger of the Mind. Woodward was talented; no one could play “crazy” better!

McCoy does some research and says the disease looks like biological warfare from the 1990s, something they’ve long abandoned. Well that’s reassuring.

We learn that the Yangs are gathering to attack the village, thousands of them. An earlier attack was repelled by Tracey, using his phaser. Apparently this is a clear violation of the Prime Directive and Kirk is obliged to act. So let me get this straight, you have to let the savages kill you rather than demonstrate a high-tech phaser on a primitive planet. Ya think they have much trouble getting Starfleet personnel to go along with that? “Just let them tear you apart, or you’ll be in so much trouble!”

Anyway Tracey appears and phasers Galloway into oblivion (don’t worry, he’ll be alive again in subsequent episodes). Ah, conflict.

I do have to say that these “restored” episodes are really a treat to watch. Not the replaced special effects, but the footage of the actors and the sets. So much better than what we had to watch on CRT sets with rabbit ears, all blurry.

Tracey tells Kirk the natives are immune to all disease, and has one of the Kohms tell Kirk he’s 462 years old. Tracey wants McCoy to find the secret and then they can bargain for whatever they want – what price immortality? And that’s why it’s worth violating the Prime Directive; it’s for Humanity!



Kirk tries to get the jump on Tracey so he gets thrown in a cell with the Yang couple, who try to kill him. Finally Spock nerve-pinches the girl from next door, and the Yang male stops fighting to “tend” to his fallen mate. When Kirk mentions “freedom” to Spock the Yang male shows he can speak, and tells Kirk it’s a Yang “worship-word.” They work together on the bars to the window until Kirk turns his back, then the male clubs Kirk and escapes with his mate.

Reunited with Bones, we learn through techobabble that the environmental cure only takes a few hours, and any of them can leave the planet safely now. Further, that there is no longevity effect, sorry Tracey. Through the logic of technobabble it was all for nothing.

Tracey staggers in to relate how the Yang battle went (badly). The Yangs are going to come in and decimate the village, but Sulu won’t send down any phasers as Tracey demands. Kirk offers to beam them all up to the Enterprise but Tracey would rather kill him. Fortunately they’re captured by Yangs before that happens.

Interesting observation, earlier the Yangs were heralded by war drums, and now they’re yipping like American Indians. When in fiction white American civilization is showed to have collapsed, many times the authors incorporate American Indian traits into the survivors. I don’t see anything wrong with it, but it’s there. Heck, it was even there in Fallout New Vegas. Anyway, here in Trek they make it explicit, and make the connection of Yangs to Yankees and Kohms to Communists. This is the Trek habit that makes me (and many others) roll my eyes. It’s just too much, Gene. Something parallel with different names, maybe. But not this close.



Now things are too unlikely, but consider. Written during the height of the Cold War with the USSR, the US flag is carried in by the Yangs to the Star Spangled Banner playing in the soundtrack, and Kirk, Spock and McCoy rise to their feet at attention, overwhelmed. That is a thrilling moment.

Next is even better. Cloud William, the chief of the Yangs (and the guy Kirk shared a cell with) starts to recite the Pledge of Allegiance and Kirk finishes it! Another chill, my fellow Americans. Tracey starts out by telling the Enterprise crew to follow along with him, but when Kirk completes the Pledge he turns against them and tries to set them up to take a fall. He casts Spock in the role of Devil, and Cloud William’s bible has a drawing that shows a strong resemblance. Good bible.

Cloud William challenges Kirk to complete the words he reads from his most holy work. Tracey interrupts and Kirk challenges him to single combat under the belief that good triumphs over evil. Spock uses his Vulcan mental powers to make a suggestion to Sirah, Cloud William’s mate. He does this over a distance, which is pretty neat. Kirk gets the advantage of Tracey but refuses to kill him, just when Spock gets Sirah to activate a communicator. Sulu beams in with Security, all brandishing phasers. This is b*llsh*t because that was the whole argument about why Tracey was a criminal!

Anyway, now to the climax. Kirk scolds Cloud William because he says the words “without meaning.” He gets the parchment and the scholar tries to stop him, saying they’re only for chiefs. Shatner gets a memorable scene in which he reads the preamble to the Constitution and says the words must apply to everyone or they mean nothing. Cloud William says that though he doesn’t fully understand what Kirk is saying, the holy words will be obeyed. Kirk walks away, but not without a look back at the star-spangled banner.

Okay, the premise that there can be that many parallels between Earth history and some nameless planet out there is ludicrous. But Roddenberry sold the show as being able to pull this kind of nonsense off in order to keep the budget down. Whatever hand-wavey explanation you come up with, it can’t cover parallels to this degree. The flag, the actual Constitution, the phrase United States. On the other hand, to a patriot (and we should all be patriots), this is a powerful episode. To an American in the midst of the Cold War, this was a boost. At no point is there anything in the episode that could be taken as derogatory about the Communist side on this planet, Omega IV, and that’s a major, major plus for Star Trek.

What do you think? I’ll tell you what I think. This episode has a whole lot of stuff happening in it. Damned good acting. And truly moving scenes. How often do you get the chance to explain the importance of what America stands for? Although I knew what to expect, I still really enjoyed this rewatch, and I’m going to add this to my list of season two favorites. Let’s sum up.

Season One Favorites:
Mudd’s Women
Charlie X
The Naked Time
The Conscience of the King
The Alternative Factor
City on the Edge of Forever
Space Seed
Errand of Mercy
This Side of Paradise

Season Two Favorites:
Patterns of Force
Amok Time
The Apple
Journey to Babel
Mirror, Mirror
I, Mudd
The Trouble with Tribbles
A Piece of the Action
The Ultimate Computer
The Omega Glory

We only have one episode left to watch in season two, that would be Assignment: Earth. See you next time!